Dydo — "Coffee Milk"

by Aimee Bender

DYDO MILK COFFEE!!!!!! (click can to enlarge)

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First off, there is a brown cow on the front with perky ears, the kind of cow that I could be friends with. The kind of cow with a friendly name. And the bottom of the can is the perfect color of coffee with quite a bit of cream and perhaps even something red, like grenadine, mixed in. Cherry coffee? I am looking forward to tasting it.

The poptop lid is fast, effective. It wants me to drink it. Smells good. Smells kind of like the instant coffee machine I just put money into, to have a decaf in a cup.

Upon tasting it: it is metallic tasting. It is sweet. It is friendly, like the cow picture, and reminds me of a liquid version of the coffee candies I have in my home, in a red glass candy dish given to me by my grandmother;


it is those coffee candies: Coffee Nips or Cafe Latte candies from Trader Joe's, but wrapped in a metallic taste shell. I like it. It is also extremely easy to drink. Almost frighteningly so.

Also, and finally: the can is so solid! This can is not to be crushed underfoot, it is a can to plant something inside, or a can that will protect the coffee. That is part of the coffee's taste: a delicate quality or a fragile, fake sweetness, and the can will protect it well.

Aimee Bender is most recently the author of Willful Creatures, but in Japan, you can find her first book, The Girl in the Flammable Skirt, and her second will be translated soon. She's also been published in Granta, GQ, Tin House, and other journals and anthologies, including The Best American Non-Required Reading of 2005.

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